TR From Last Weekend: How to Cheat the Devil’s Path

December 4, 2010 · 0 comments

Thumbs up How to Cheat the Devil’s Path

by Ted Wallace
Age 34

Step #1:  Do it in two days.  The Devil’s Path in a single day is for . . . well, I’m not going to tell you who it’s for right now.  Maybe when I’m a little older.

Step #2:  Don’t start from Prediger Road, start from the Long Path TH at the end of 16.  You can shave at least a couple of flat boring miles off.

Step #3:  Don’t sleep outside in late November.  Sleep somewhere warm and dry that offers hot showers.  And eat like royalty when you’re not on the trail (do so when ON the trail for an even more advanced move).

Step #4:  When planning the route, be as flexible as possible.  Euthanize, castrate or tranquilize any alpha route-planners in the party well in advance of the trip itself.

Step #5:  Do it with really cool people – you’ll never notice the miles go by.

Last Saturday (11/27) we did the eastern section of the DP.  ‘We’ being yours ever truly, SSMonte288 (or whatever effin number I can’t remember; hereinafter referred to as “Bill”), Halia (of H&F; hereinafter “Heather” or “Heather The Famous Author”), debmonster (hereinafter “Debbie” or “the monster”), and Valerie (hereinafter “Valerie” or “Valtron”).

We slept at Bill’s house (well, it wasn’t really HIS house, but I’m not going to get into the whole story of how that worked – suffice to say that we all had warm beds and hot showers) on Friday and Saturday nights.  SAT question-worthy car spotting problems were solved and cars were spotted, un-spotted and re-spotted on Friday night, Saturday morning, and Sunday at some point but I don’t remember because Sunday was a long day.

Mudhook’s TR describing the trail conditions of the eastern section of the DP on Sunday were relatively close to what we experienced on Saturday: some ice (microspikes were used), not much mud (but it was there), and a general chill in the air.  Snow fell lightly and sparsely but steadily throughout the day on Saturday.  I lost my sunglasses while bushwacking up the first ledge on Indian Head, so if you find them, please return them.  Do not attempt to invoke the I Look Better in Them Than You rule because that’s frankly impossible.  As a matter of fact, please send your girlfriend to me with the sunglasses as well.

Sunday was much nicer because the sun was out.  Heather was on the KHP hike, so, being that she hasn’t yet figured out how to be in two places at once (amateur), she wasn’t on the western section of the DP with us on Sunday as well. Seriously, that’s like negative mom-cred, Heather. 

I don’t remember what time we started out from the Notch Lake PA on Sunday, but our timing was perfect, because by the time we got to the lookout on West Kill (Buck Ridge?), FatVegan (hereinafter “Scott” or “that a$hole” or “my f*cken hetero lifemate”) and my sister Katie (hereinafter “my sister Katie” or just “Katie”) had just arrived as well.  They hiked in from the western TH terminus of the DP on Spruceton Road (or, as daLunartik would say “Sprucetown Road”).  Then we all hiked out together (Bill, Katie, Scott, Debbie, Ted, Valerie).  <– Ted sandwiches are recommended.  I ran off and bagged Hunter and Leavitt while Bill, Debbie and Valerie walked a little slower to give me room to catch up.  Peakbagging might be a disease, but I can stop whenever I want.  Scott and I bagged St. Anne’s Peak on the way down as well.  What?! It’s on a list.

After finishing up at the DP SR TH (nobody wanted to bag North Dome & Sherrill and I’d already done them in November), we drove all over creation to pick up our respective cars and then headed to that restaurant called Hickory on 28 near the Thruway, where we all gorged ourselves on BBQ.  FatVegan had a salad and the owner came out and led the whole restaurant in a good round of pointing and laughing, which is always good for the soul.

I’m not going to tell you any more about the hike itself because it was a porn hike and I don’t feel like giving you no0bie lurkers an opportunity to fap-fap-fap away at your computer when we did all the work.  I’m not saying we did anything dirty in the woods (nor am I saying we didn’t), but were I to attempt to relate the reasons for our laughter that were involved over the 20-something miles of the DP last weekend, your head would probably explode.  Seriously:  it’s for your own good, nOob. The secret to ripped abs is lots and lots of laughing.

Here are the tracklogs on my EveryTrail page:

11/27/2010 DP East

11/28/2010 DP West

I’m sure I’m forgetting things.  Scott, Katie, Heather, Debbie, Bill (forum members): please add whatever you think might be relevant.  As I said probably a hundred times, it was wonderful to hike with you.

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