It’s 5:30-something in the morning. And I didn’t just wake up. My plane landed Sunday late in the afternoon; I was up until around 11 on Sunday night and slept the day away on Monday. I got up Monday evening around 5:30 and did my laundry and ran some errands. Stopped by Scott’s place to chill with his cat Poseidon (Scott’s in FL for his brother’s wedding), then came home and read Foundation and Empire, the second of Asimov’s Foundation series. Maybe it’s the third, but my understanding is that Prelude to Foundation was written after the rest of the books in the series.
I’ve cleaned my apartment a bit, smoked a bunch of cigarettes, and put my work paperwork in some semblance of order for tomorrow. My plan is to go in wicked early and hopefully leave early. I didn’t sleep on the flight back from Taiwan, which made for a 20-something hour day on Sunday, followed by around 18 hours of sleep (give or take – DST has me kind of messed up, too), so I’m not really sure where I am in terms of sleep schedule or how to get back to normal. I really don’t want to have anything to do with those hard-wakeups – the ones where I really don’t want to get out of bed, even though it’s time to do so. But I suppose they’re inevitable.
I hadn’t really planned anything work- or life-wise past this Taiwan trip. Work-wise, I need to spend some time at my desk, sending well-written follow-up emails to the contacts I made. I also need to put my expense report together – that’s going to be a doozie: about $2k just for the hotel and conference. It’ll be a nice chunk of change coming back to me, and by the goddess, if anybody second-guesses anything on that report, I’m going to shit on their keyboard and rub it in with their face. I was surely not extravagant in my expenditures.
I also have a handful of emails sitting in my inbox that need responses and a couple of small projects to complete that I was working on while in Taiwan. Email is kind of fucked up – they moved from one server to another on Saturday, so I need to figure out what’s going on with that. The only emails in my inbox on my work iPhone are the ones I’ve received since Saturday, and none of my folders are present. The Outlook on my computer won’t sync with the server, and, from some of the emails in my iPhone inbox, it would seem as though my rules and alerts have been disabled. I can’t get onto the webmail function either, so I don’t know which emails are on the server and which aren’t. I’ll be pretty pissed if all the emails between 10/29 and 11/6 have been lost. Email is pretty important at my gig.
So beyond getting to the office, figuring out what the fuck is up with the email system, sending out my nice-to-meet-yous, putting my expense report together and finding out why the fuck I haven’t been given a key to the office yet, I really don’t know what to do with myself. If I had a key to the office, I’d have gone in tonight and sent out the n-t-m-ys and put my expense report together, but fuck me, I’m not driving all the way to Bloomfield in the hope that the side door is unlocked.
Plus, I think some of the guys in the office are expecting some sort of report for me on how things went. I’m actually kind of anxious about that and feeling a bit like I should be able to get right back to work, jetlag issues aside. Well fuck that. I’m going to go into the office in a couple of hours, coffee and taylor ham egg and cheese on an everything bagel salt pepper ketchup in hand, do as many of the things I can before I’m too tired to do any more, and go the fuck home. The jetlag will work itself out, I’m sure, but I’m sure as hell not going to bend over backwards any farther than I already have. Those motherfuckers barely gave me any time to prepare for this trip, so they can damn well hang out until I’m good and ready to give them my report – whatever the fuck that’s supposed to look like.
Humility, Ted: humility. A “worker among workers” and all that.
Yeah, right. I’m trying. I’m a much better worker when I’m not hanging out waiting for someone to unlock the door or fix the email system.
No idea what I’m doing this weekend. Friday is my birthday and that’s the last I’ll say on that. I don’t do birthday celebrations. Luckily, I was sick unto death on by birthday last year (and for the sandwiching days as well). I’ll probably do dinner with my family on Friday night because my sister wants to (it’ll be a good excuse to bring my mother flowers), but that’s about it.
Hiking. Definitely hiking on Saturday and/or Sunday. I have a whole bunch of mountains to climb for my November grid, so there’s that. I’m considering going on this winter camping deathmarch in the first couple of days of December and I’ll need to get out and do some wicked long hard hikes if I want to get in shape for that.
I’m currently feeling a kind of violent and restless loneliness that comes over me from time to time. The one where I don’t return phone calls or emails because they all seem to be just one more straw on this camel’s already burdened back. It’s not an entirely unwelcome feeling; I just wish I had a direction in which to point myself.
I’ll sigh here, if you don’t mind, dear reader.