A Little Bit of Bitching

July 1, 2009 · 3 comments

Don’t See Transformers

We went to see the new Transformers movie tonight.  The only reason I haven’t stabbed out my own eyes with a dull rusty nail (the carpenter’s implement, not the drink) is you, dear reader. 

Everything – EVERYTHING – was overacted in that movie.  It was like the actors thought they were on stage, instead of on screen.  The transformers themselves were so complex that I couldn’t tell asses from elbows during the fight scenes – which (thankfully) was most of the movie. 

Plot? 

Nope.

And Optimus Prime did not have lips in real life.  That’s probably what killed me the most.  Kudos, boys for getting the original O.P.-voice dude to do the movies, but hell, the Autobot leader wore a metal bandana in real life, for chrissake.

The only character I actually kind of dug was the old pirate-looking SR-71 Blackbird nutjob.  He sacrifices himself at the end and nobody says boo about it.  Sorry if that qualifies as a spoiler, but whatever.  That movie sucked.  I don’t recommend it in any way, shape or form.  I would have had more fun losing those brain cells by hitting myself in the head with a ball-peen hammer. 

But I got to hang out with my sister, brother, cousin, and buddy (Katie, John, Danny and David) – which made the whole experience worthwhile.

Cell Phone Still Broke

My cell phone is still broken.  No display whatsoever, and I can’t make or take any calls from it.  I tried both Sprint/Nextel stores in the mall before the movie, and neither could help me.  No big deal.  It would be nice to be able to make and take phone calls, but I’m doing just fine without the friggin thing right now.  I’ll see if I can find another store to get a replacement during my half-not-at-work-day tomorrow.  Sorry to all those who think I’m dead or dismembered.

Pain in the Ass Chick at Work

There’s a girl at work who bums a cigarette from me a couple of times a month.  Over the last couple of years, she’s bummed way more than a pack from me, and has never offered to buy me a pack or even give me one of hers when she has them. 

Being that cigarette smokers are now a dwindling minority, we need to stick together more than ever.  Shit, I should probably see if there’s a facebook cause or a lobbying effort here in my home state of NJ.  We get taxed on our smokes like nobody’s business and it’s a real pain in the ass. 

For the most part, there’s kind of an unspoken code of ethics among cigarette smokers.  Little things like if someone asks for one, you give it to them – even if you don’t know them.  It’s a very “pay it forward” kind of thing, and pretty much works for everyone.  Anybody who looks like they can afford to buy a pack of cigarettes but just doesn’t have one right now is automatically entitled to bum a single cigarette from any other smoker on the planet.  If it’s possible to return the favor at some later date, we do.

People who ask for spare change before asking for a cigarette (or people who look like they’re going to ask you for spare change) are not entitled to free cigarettes from fellow smokers.  That’s handled on a person-to-person charity basis.

This chick at work bummed another Newp from me today.  Oh, she’s very polite about it and usually has a great excuse like “I left mine at home” or something.  Bah.  Who leaves their cigarettes at home that often?  She should drive her ass to the 7-11 or just get crabby from nicotine withdrawal like everybody else if she can’t remember that she’s got to feed her addiction.  After politely asking, she hangs around my cube for a few minutes and makes small-talk.  She doesn’t do that unless she’s bumming a cigarette from me. 

She’s cute and I even asked her out for coffee a couple of times last year or the year before.  She was all like “yeah, that would be cool – call me” and then wouldn’t return my texts or calls.  Not that I texted or called more than once each time she said that, but wtf, let’s be polite mature adults about this and not just blow one another off.

So yeah, that’s enough outta me for tonight.  I could probably be better organized in my bitching this evening, but I don’t think the movie, the phone, or the chick deserves that kind of respect on this blog.

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{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }

Ron July 1, 2009 at 23:50

Megan Fox has a thumb that oils like a big toe.

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BRIAN July 2, 2009 at 09:54

This effin guy I work with bums smokes from me on a regular basis. Sometimes 3 a day. Between him and people I see not at work I’m probably giving out about a pack a week at this point. I’ve thought about quitting just to spite him and others. He says he leaves his in his car or at home so he doesn’t smoke too much. What kind of a deusche thing is that to say. He sure doesn’t mind smoking too many of mine. I love those people who don’t buy there own in an effort to quit but still don’t mind smoking other peoples. My brother-in-law is like that. It’s a given withen 10 minutes of seeing him that he’s gonna ask me if I want to go smoke than ask me for 1.

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$@bs July 2, 2009 at 22:48

LOL! I like the ‘PITA chick at work story’ You should try bumming one from her every once in a while #paybacksabitch (damn not Twitter)

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